hiya , i am now in a lost, i gotta make a decision on how my life works on. In my years of living, i had trained nearly 4 years of wushu since i was 12. I merly didi not managed to see much improvements on myself. Yesterday, i asked myself sincerely y i did not show improvements. By thinking all the time i did not improvement, tears flowed down my cheeks. I knew that i am not crying but it was a natural reaction that tears would come out of my eyes. I had a great passion for that sport and i usually tried my best for that sport. But sometimes, when i put my heart and soul into wushu, i sometimes would ask myself whether that i should be there in the first place. I almost wanted to give up yesterday but after much consideration i wanted to continue but i was in low sprit. I felt that i could not excel even though i tried my best. I talked to 2 of my seniors yesterday on msn on how to improve on wushu. They both said the same thing, they said smart training. I was like huh that wan is what...........I made a promise that i would excel in wushu one day... I did not know until my teacher told me that i was too obsessed in training. I learnt that smart training includes hard work , disicipline and need to learn from mistakes... Yesterday was quite a sad day for me, i think so hard and asked myself to force the most sincere and thruthful answer. I thought that it was something could be achieved by me but it is knida diffucult. No matter how difficult it was, my seniors told me it all depends on how i faced it....but i was afraid i would fail again...... i always said this, what should i do, what should i do?......... so sad that this year cannot compete in group cause i am one of thje eldest in the sch team..... Jiao lian so busy training the ji ti quan , like no time for my individual routines... I need to train my self i knew it.... to be indepedent.......